Loneliness has such a negative connotation to it. I have begun to notice that people my age are afraid to be alone, but I find it necessary. I believe God gives us a time of loneliness in order for us to clear our minds, dig deeper in His Word and build a better relationship with Him. This is what many know as the "Single Season".
I am dating to marry. I don't want to waste my time with meaningless relationships. If I know that it is not going anywhere, there is no reason to continue to waste my time or his. In my opinion if there is no future, there is no point. There are so many other things I could be doing instead of putting my energy into something that has no potential to grow into something more. No casual dating for me.
Forming a stronger bond with Jesus is the top priority for me at this time. I'd rather have a time of singleness and loneliness, than have a relationship with someone that I know isn't going anywhere. I want to be whole and complete- mentally, spiritually, and emotionally and the only way to do that is to cut out all of the distractions. How am I supposed to meet my Adam, if I continue to entertain boys? Boys who aren't deep into the Word, who don't want to give me 110%, who don't respect me. I know that as I am becoming whole, my Adam is doing the same and when the timing is right, God will show him to me.
And on that note... Remember: God shows you who is good for you and who is not. Please believe Him when He shows you! If you're the only one putting in effort, let it go!
Are you going to embrace your time of singleness/loneliness or are you going to keep dating people who are not right for you and continue to get hurt?
xx,
Alexis Sade'
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My life has changed so much in the past year. Never in a million years would I have thought I'd be transferring schools, living in Kansas City, and moving into my first big girl apartment next month! (which I am very excited to decorate btw) During my transition of moving to KC, I had an array of emotions; I was filled with anger, resentment, and I was just plain old sad, broken in fact. I was leaving my best friend (love you Gabs!) and all the friends I made at school, which I had to give up too. It was my dream school. Not only did I not know what I was going to do about college, I didn't have a job either! I felt so lost and confused. I questioned why God was doing this to me multiple times. Well, I packed my bags and headed for KC on Saturday. On Sunday, I experienced the greatness of Sheffield Family Life Center. I love that it is a large, diverse church, but still has that small church feeling. Now don't get me wrong, I went to church when I lived in Alabama. I just was one of those sometime-y church people. I did not have an official church home, I didn't tithe regularly, and I did not study the Word. I got up and went about two times out of the month and I honestly thought that was sufficient enough. Monday, I went to go look for a job at Zona Rosa and landed one at Forever 21 the same day! And by the end of the week I had a job as a teller at BankLiberty. Isn't God crazy faithful!? School was another story... Since it was so late in the summer, I decided to go to community college. I was hesitant in the beginning, but I am so glad I did it. I met an incredible friend (hey Mitchell!), I gained confidence in public speaking, and I actually did well in two subjects that have been troublesome for me since grade school. Before moving, I did research some schools and applied to them, but the financial aid and scholarships just weren't adding up. Well, conversing with my coworkers about school, my good old pal Patti told me I should try the Henry W. Bloch School of Management at UMKC, I did, and I got accepted. I am so excited for this journey. The Bloch School is seriously something out of a movie; I love the design of the building and the faculty is amazing! Fast forward almost a year later and I'll be signing the lease to my apartment in less than three weeks! I am thrilled to continue to take steps in order to gain my independence. But what am I getting at by telling you all of this? Trust the path God is placing you on. Have faith in your future! "Now faith is the confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." "By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible." Hebrews 11: 1 & 3 NIV
P.S. A very big thank you to my aunt, uncle, and cousins for welcoming me into their home with open arms. They made my transition much easier. I love you all. Evil for evil. In the past, I always had it set in my mind that when someone did wrong by me, I would let it be known (in a not so nice way) that I had a problem. That became SO exhausting! I thought, "Well I'll handle it now and get it off my chest. I don't want to wait or not say something and let them think that it's okay to do that to me." If someone irritated me, I always had to express my feelings. Well, a lot of things began to irritate me and I couldn't pinpoint every single person to tell them... that would take all day. I had to reflect: 1. Why am I letting people get under my skin? 2. Is it really worth my time to say something? 3. Will this person be relevant in my life a year from now? or even a month? Time to research! I absolutely needed to find scripture to help me with this before it became a bigger issue in my life. "17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: " It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. 20 On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry feed him, if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Romans 12: 17-21 NIV Plain and simple: leave it in God's hands! Sometimes it is easier said than done, but God will take care of it in due time. There isn't a need to say something. In the end who is it really hurting? Me or them? Do right by everyone, even when they don't do right by you. xx, Alexis Sade' With the rise of social media, there are even more outlets to share the word of Christ. I see a lot of posts on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter of Bible verses, inspirational thoughts, and even testimonies. I want to talk a little about Bible verses. I love coming across new verses! It is truly amazing that this one book has everything I need for life. A few months ago I decided that every time I come across a Bible verse, I will read the whole chapter that the verse comes from. Well, I did this yesterday and I was truly moved. The verse is Philippians 4:13. One of the most popular Bible verses; it states, "I can do ALL things through Christ, who strengthens me." I love this verse, but what comes before it is even more powerful! "11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." Philippians 4: 11 & 12 NIV Reading the chapter of a verse I discover puts things in perspective for me. Sometimes there is a story leading up to a verse or even guidelines on how to live out that particular verse. Whenever you stumble upon a verse I challenge you to look up the whole chapter and dive into the word. Just remember, there is always more to it!
xx, Alexis Sade' |